Wow – it seems that only a few moments ago my boys were still boys … and now they are stepping into man hood. My youngest ‘boy’ is almost 18. I have just returned from a weekend away and being with 3 of my ‘boys’ and it was just wonderful. My other ‘boy’ (my ‘step’ son), is in South Africa having a dad experience with his father.
My eldest ‘boy is off overseas in a couple of weeks – he is in the army and will be away for 5 months doing what he needs to do. Letting them go is never easy, not interfering too much is not easy, speaking my mind and my truth is also not always easy. That is the challenge of being a father I suppose; learning to speak, let go and not interfering is all part of the journey. As they grow into being men, it is also their challenge to let go, not interfere and speak their own truth. Young men can learn this, to some degree, from what we, the older men, show and teach them. we can learn to lead by example – and sometimes this is not easy, as we all get it wrong on occasions, I know that I certainly have.
Being with my ‘boys’ on the weekend gave me a real sense of pride. I am proud in the way in which they have developed and grown and am proud of the way in which I have been a father to them – I have learned to let go of old past guilt – and am proud of who and what I have become. Seeing them walk their own paths and find their own way of doing things and making new decisions is wonderful.
I look back at my own journey from boyhood to manhood and see now, with the gift of hindsight, how I made it; how I made my way through it. WOW – there were some pretty scary and challenges time when I think about it. I often joke that my Guardian Angels must have worked overtime!
I want to honour my ‘boys’ by calling them ‘young men’ – and by saying that I love them deeply. I look forward to the next few decades to see where you go to in your lives …
On the weekend my eldest son’s mother made a cake – a ‘moist coconut cake’ and it was very yummy.
Here is my moist coconut cake recipe.
Ingredients: 4 eggs, 200 grams sugar, 200 grams of softened butter, 150 grams of desiccated coconut, 300 grams of self raising flour, 1/2 teaspoon of vanilla essence, about 150 – 200 milliliters of milk – (I use coconut milk).
Icing for the top and the middle – 100 grams of butter, 100 grams of icing sugar, 30 grams of desiccated coconut, a few drops of colouring – I use beetroot juice. Mix it all together.
Method: Mix the eggs, sugar and butter in a bowl until light and creamy. Add the other ingredients and mix for 2 minutes until light and creamy.
Place int o a lined/greased round 25cm cake tin and bake for 35-40 minutes on 180 degrees. When the cake is cool, cut the cake in half and add half of the icing sugar mix. Then put together again and put the remainder of the icing sugar mix on the top of the cake.